Everyone Communicates, Few Connect: What the Most Effective People Do Differently
Hilary Ashmen, M.Ed., Adult Learning Consultant
Welcome to another installment of our leadership resources book review to facilitate your continued growth and move your ideas to action. This month we add John C.Maxwell’s Everyone Communicates, Few Connect to your professional reading list and provide reflection via Hilary’s interview with Emily Tevault, Chief Producktivity®Officer with BSCorbett Consulting.
Everyone Communicates, Few Connect is a valuable resource for those who are ready to strengthen their communication through connections. The author presents five principles for understanding how to connect effectively. These are reinforced with five practices to immediately use with individuals, groups, and audiences. Anyone can connect if they are willing to learn and apply the strategies. It is a skill that can dramatically change your life.
Emily has utilized Maxwell’s principles to support her in creating strong relationships with clients. The principles and practices correlate with the International Coach Federation (ICF) core competencies. In her coaching role, career, and personal life, individual connections are critical. She asks questions, avoids assumptions, listens carefully, makes objective observations, and also pays attention to what isn’t being said. Connecting visually, intellectually, and emotionally allows her to build stronger relationships. This does, of course, require Emily to prepare, give, and recharge. Relationships need energy to grow, so recharging is the key to being able to give again.
Emily noted the usefulness of the application section at the end of each chapter for its presentation in different settings: one-on-one and group. She learned that connecting one-on-one is the most important because the majority of connections are formed at this level. “To add value to others one must first value others,” is an idea that resonated with Emily and one she has incorporated into her own practice. When greeting the audience, she now focuses on expressing her appreciation for attendees and excitement for the opportunity to work with them.
In general, Emily’s natural impulse is to provide more detail. The book has, however, conveyed to her that it is equally as important to keep it simple, get to the point, say less, be clear, and repeat. Emily admits that keeping it simple is the most challenging part for her to implement and she is continuing to strengthen this communication skill.
Because she has a dynamic and expressive family, where everyone talks at the same time, Emily carried that into her other relationships. The book helped her realize that she needs to inquire and listen more. Preparing questions prior to a meeting or social gathering has helped Emily take the first step in understanding others. This sends a message that she values them and is ready to add value to the relationship.
When you find yourself needing to strengthen your communication through connections, this book is for you. Everyone Communicates, Few Connect is an invaluable resource in bolstering your personal and professional relationships. As Emily has, refer to this book to relate with others and position yourself to make the most of your skills and talents. We all talk. To communicate successfully, we need to connect.
The book is recommended for…
- Anyone ready to move to the next level of leadership
- Those needing a powerful tool for working more effectively with others
Share your thoughts about your communications and connections, join the conversation below.
Maxwell, J.C. (2010). Everyone communicates, few connect: What the most effective people do differently. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson.